Wash Day Blues

No, not those wash day blues, although may I take this opportunity to update you? The table linen? Still a blueish hue. The camisole top? In the duster bag. The rugby shirt? Hidden at the bottom of the ironing basket and the confession yet to be made. The only reason all hell hasn't broken out is that Jeff received a new hoodie for Christmas that seems to have welded itself to his back. Something the Captain has encouraged by washing and drying it overnight on the rare occasions we can prise him out of it. But I fear the pre-confession days are numbered. Largely because ... cue dramatic music ... the washing machine has broken ... cue gasps and sharp intakes of breath.

Seeing as we're a tad brassic at the moment, it being just after Christmas and all, we called a washing machine repair man out. He came today. He sucked his teeth. He rubbed his chin. And before you could say 'Tea with two sugars, love' he announced I'd be needing a new one. Bollocks.

Now I don't have a particularly good track record with washing machines. But I've tried really hard with this one. After all, it's really belonged to the Laundry King. I am only a minion who has lost the battle for washing supremacy. Now that I come to think of it, it's been years since I used milk instead of fabric conditioner. In fact, I don't even think it was even in this machine. And I've not done this for ages:

Maybe that's been the trouble and I should revert to my former ways? You see for some time now it's been very noisy. I once told Tilly that there was a man inside who washed the clothes and the banging was him trying to escape. Big mistake. She was outraged. You'd think I'd have learned not to tell stories to a child who takes everything literally by now, wouldn't you? Anyway there's been a lot of this for months:

It would shake and bounce so much it wandered across the floor. But this week, oh my! It got so loud, I swear we kept half the road awake with the noise. Hence the phone call. But having paid him his £40 call out fee, I really think he should have told me he could fix it for 37p, don't you? Seems rather rude that he didn't.

There is good news in all of this. For Christmas the Captain and I were given some money. Not hundreds but some. Enough to buy a new coffee maker. So we have. I ordered it last night. Then I ordered lots of coffee for it. And I'm sooo excited because I lurve coffee, even if Holly's forbidden me to put chocolate in it during January (oh yes, nearly 2 days in and going strong!). Did you catch that? I ordered it last night. It's too late to cancel, the money's gone, my credit card has flinched, there is no way I can cancel. No really, I can't. Seriously. No! Which means our Christmas money can't be sucked into the washing machine - hoorah! Not quite sure what I'll be buying the new one with but we could always just stay dirty and drink lots of really really nice coffee. Now that's not such a bad plan, is it?